Turning Things Around

The month of June is the month I consciously decided to change for the better.

I remember when I was in college. I was gloomy on my second year, having realized the past school year that I made the worst decision for my life when I took up BS in Nursing as my undergraduate degree.

At my most depressed time, my professor told the whole class that if we are not happy with our decision, we just have to consciously try to be.

She was talking to the whole class, but that time, I felt like she was talking to me.

I decided to be happy. And I, genuinely felt happy for the rest of my college days.

The last week of May has been an eye opener for me. It wsas difficult to imagine having been fired from the work I waited for four long years to come. So I made the conscious decision to do my best.

I started attending a computer programming course. I enrolled to a French Language tutorial, although we have not yet started with our class. The best thing is, I was able to double my work output.

My boss is still the same, an old hag. But at least I am able to get back.

When I was in college my personal blog has contributed a lot on how I cope with the stresses and unhappiness of my decision to take up nursing. Now, I decided to create a professional blog that will be my professional portfolio and I am really excited!

If I this isn’t the worst, I wonder how worse the next coming months would be

May 2013 has got to be the lowest I have been in the office. Not only have I offended a Chief in another Department, but my blunders has actually gotten my boss in a hot seat in a Senior Staff meeting. The only thing I was very much thankful about is that I don’t get to work as the secretariat for the meetings or else I would have melted right there and there.

Last week, my boss finally talked to me with my immediate supervisor. Without and subtlety, she told me, “You don’t want us to get to the point when I have juyst to ask you to resign, are you?”

Sigh….

Today, I was ordered to exchange desk with a newbie, a sociologist.

Scared to take the next steps

It’s true, we can never be satisfied with what we have.

If you ask me about myself, one of the things that I will probably say is that I am very easy to please. But recently, I have seen myself wanting and greatly unsatisfied with how things are going on with my life.

Two years ago, all I wanted was just to get a job. I took a wrong choice of course in college, and after graduating last 2008, it took me four years to finally land a real job.

January of 2011, after years of failure to find a decent job and working online,  I finally told myself that I have surrendered looking for a job and aiming for the sky. I thought, probably I would just eke out a life as an online writer for anonymous bosses online FOREVER. I’d talk to my classmates from college and most of them have had the same feeling. But God must have pity me so much, I got a call from my current job and was interviewed and consequently hired.

By no means I am qualified at all. My education would have gotten me a job in the hospital, I am a Registered Nurse, But now I am working in an office under a really competent and amazing government agency.

However, as I immersed myself with coworkers who have amazing education to boast – chemists, sociologists, biochemists, biologists, library and information scientists, nurses with Masters Degree in Epidemiology, and a boss with 500-page resume, I started to think what the next step for me.

I was never a bright student in college. I graduated with barely a passing mark. I never had an amazing trail of work experience. I want to continue my education. I want to change my life. But I do not know how to start. I know I can choose another degree if I want to, but I am scared.

I am scared that I may not be good enough.

Protocol, Anyone?

I hate it when I communicate with people outside the office and then they suddenly call or text my boss to reply. I mean after a few weeks of exchanges of emails, i don’t quite get why some (especially the old ones) don’t seem to understand that in an office, a protocol is at place. You talk to the person who communicates with you and not his boss because when you do, you create confusion and you put the person in a very bad light.

This is exactly what happened to me this afternoon, and boy, my boss was obviously railing up her scream. She thought I was being lazy and stuff. This wasn’t the first time, and I feel like I haven thrown under the bus.

Long Weekend

Yearly, our family travel up north to Isabela for the Holy Week. The sad thing is that there is nothing really we can do there. Unlike, say, Laguna or Bataan, provinces in Region 2 is really underdeveloped. There are no place to go, and the places that are supposed to be touristy are very disappointing. Another problem with staying there during this time of the the year is the intense heat. Tugegarao, a city 3 hours North of Isabela is the hottest place in the Philippines so you can imagine the kind of extreme temperature that we have in Isabela. My grandmother has long since stopped paying the cable TV so I don’t expect to see anything on the TV as well.

Wgat makes matter worse is my [hone is still being repaired at the HTC repair shop. It’s been there for like a month alread and they haven’t replaced the parts that needed replacing. As well, the internet connection is next to nothing. So there is virtually no form of entertainment for me for the next 3 days.

This is why I bought two books, “Warm Bodies” by Isaaac Marion and “The Giver” by Lois Lowry. I really, really, really want to read them now, but I’m trying to stop myself so I could read them in Isabela.

Brighter than theSun

Summer is finally here and I just love how thingsare unraveling. I get to go to Tagaytay last week.  Yeah, I know it’s pretty lame that it took me 25 years before stepping on such beautiful place. My officemates, who almostall lived all their lives South of Luzon couldn’t believe either. They were like, “If you like wecan accompany you thyere.” So I took the chance and went with them.

 

This week, I will be going to Batangas and next week, I am heading to Isabela. On April, I will be visiting Corregidor 🙂

October – Halloween

Today is the eve of Halloween. My sisters and I are going to our hometown tonight to be with our father.

It’s such a shame that so many things are happening to me and yet I am not able to accomplish one goal – at least one blog post. I dunno, maybe it’s because my workload is too heavy or probably because no one really reads my blog the way my old blog garnered so many readers.

I was suppose to go to Dumaguete City and also Gen. Santos city, but to my dismay, my boss has opted to send only one person. Although I was really disappointed, I believe that the decision was actually good for me. The last time I left for a whole week, i came back to a ton-worth of work. The worse thing was my boss insisted that I should have finished some of my tasks even if I was away, which was really unreasonable. I mean, how am I suppose to attend any meeting if I’m 8 hours away from the office? Right now, I am part of two committees in two  different events. I attend meetings everyday so I am really glad that I was not able to join my officemate in his adventures out of town.

Reading “The Graveyard Book” by Neil Gaiman and “Looking for Alaska” by John Green

I was at the Manila International Book Fair yesterday and I bought a couple of books. Honestly, for a very long time, I thought I wouldn’t be able to finish a book. But here I was starting on the second book.

I have been very busy at work and just this week, I am going to attend an international conference here in Manila. It’s amazing how I have forgotten how fun it was to read books at all. I guess I just need to choose the right kind of books.

Although I’m in my midtwenties, I still enjoy books that are written for teenagers. Not the kind of angsty ones, I veer more toward those filled with adventure and probably magic.

This coming months, I probably going to obsess my self to Neil Gaiman from now on. The first book I bought yesterday was “The Graveyard Book” and it was surprisingly easy to read. The hero, Bod, was someone I could really relate to and is easy to like.

The friend that I was with insisted that  on “Looking for Alaska” by John Green, which I started reading this afternoon, immediately after I read the Graveyard Book. However, I have now read a quarter of the book but I am really bored. There wasn’t anything going on. I personally think the book was too self-absorbed. The author obviously felt like he needs to narrate everything that has been going on about the protagonist in a nearly day to day manner. One thing that I also didn’t like about the book is its POV character, Miles, who was also the hero of the book. He is smug and not very likable. Although it’s his story, I felt like he was almost an audience to more exciting characters. I’m enduring to read it though just to make up for the amount I paid for it.

 

August High

If my whole year is a novel, then August is certainly the climax. Every week of it has just been so much eventful.

I spent the very first week of August up north in Ilocos Norte. I traveled to see the Paoay Church, a UNESCO World Heritage Site, and various tourists spots. I was also able to meet a possible relative. My grandfather was from Batac Ilocos Norte and I met a girl who has the same surname as I was. When we talked, it turned out that we have the same family history. Her family is known as a Chinese clan, so if we really are blood related, then that explains why my father has a fair skin and has a set of two chinky eyes.

The week after, I was welcomed with a ton of workload. The most important, undoubtedly, is the national competition for health researches. I was paired with my officemate to work as the focal person for the event. The weather has not been very good. There wasn’t any typhoon but the monsoon rain is heavy enough to flood Metro Manila underwater. Despite the cancellations, we were able to push through with the event. And I believe I did a great job. 🙂

The third week proved to be a lot more relaxed as there was a two day long holiday.

This week, I had my birthday. In fact yesterday was my birthday.

Other things that have been really awesome this month is that I feel like my responsibility at work is growing. I am now the chairman for the documentation committee for an international conference this September. Yes the documentation committee has probably the smallest and most boring job of all, but learning that my boss trust me feels good. It is after all an international event where foreign delegates are coming. I am also working now as a focal person for another national event. The event is multi-agencies so we are working with other government institutions and universities. The event will be happening for seven months so its really cool.